Casper Smart told Jennifer Lopez her thighs were too big for short skirts
Would it surprise you to learn that Jennifer Lopez has been dating Casper Smart for over two years? They started doing it (publicly at least) in late 2011, and JLo wanted everyone to know about it. He was 24 at the time, and she was 42. Fast forward, and they are still going strong … and not married. I thought for sure that Jennifer was going marry Casper after she allowed him to hold his own autograph sessions outside of her Idol dressing room.
These two crazy kids have had their share of ups and downs over the years. I enjoy hearing the stories about JLo slashing Casper’s allowance or threatening to kick him out without anything. Who knows if the stories are true, but they sure are entertaining in a Dynasty sort of way. If this new story from the Enquirer is true, then Casper probably lost his allowance again and deservedly so. No one tells mama her thighs are too big! Damn, did he really say this stuff?
Not-so-smart Casper Smart suddenly wished he’d kept his big yap shut when he went where no guy should EVER go (no words like “fat” or “old,” right, fellas?) and told live-in-love Jennifer Lopez that her thighs are “too big” for the short minidresses she sports on American Idol. …YeeeOWWW!…
Spotting smoke blasting from her ears, ex-backup dancer/toyboy Casper back-pedaled pronto, saying that he didn’t mean that she’s got … er, fat thighs — it’s just that her thighs aren’t … her best asset, maybe? … YeeIKES! … (Dude, even for a guy, so stoopid!) Jennifer erupted instantly, shrieking: “If you’re not saying my thighs are fat — then what are you saying?”
Desperate to save himself, Casper stammered: “I just meant your thighs are … muscular!” En fuego, the superstar songstress shot back: “I thought you liked my thighs! But if you don’t like what you see …!” Before she could utter another word, crushed Casper started babbling apologies/sweet-talk nonstop — and the very next night, JLo strutted onto the Idol stage flaunting a teeny-tiny micro-dress as Casper shot her a loving thumbs-up! (Finally getting SMART, eh, senor?)
[From Enquirer, print edition, April 4, 2014]
I hope JLo assigned some extra chores around the house to make up for Casper’s insensitive mouth. Extra chores are good for a young boy. They put hair on the chest.
In all seriousness, I hope Casper didn’t say this stuff. Jennifer has fantastic legs, and they’re the same that they’ve always been. Muscular legs, yes. She’s always flaunted her body. She’s not about to stop wearing short skirts. Casper sounds like an idiot who needs to shut his trap.
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet & WENN
